Everything's Blurry

Many thanks to my number-one gal Emily for this magnificent portrait of me, done in the style of the cover to this Blur 'best-of' (full disclosure: despite how my the picture on my Blogger profile looks, I am not an action figure of Deathstroke teh Terminator. Sorry everybody)
Also, this cartoony picture and talk of Deathstroke has gotten me in the mood to review This Week in Comics:

Birds of Prey- Gail Simone, Paulo Siqueria (pencils), Robin Riggs (ink)
'Twice the talent, half the sales' Part 2 of 6

The all-female superteam team up to stab the villainous Captain Comicbookbuyer in the crotch. Simone once again delivers witty dialogue, compelling plot twists and a excruciating scene in which everybody who bought All Star Batman and Robin is made to choke on the cover of issue three. Only 3000 copies of this issue have been printed and most pages aren't inked due to D.C's descision to reallocate much of their budget onto the forthcoming 'Power-girl, Starfire and Bulleteer: Pillowfight of Destiny'.
Next month: Part 3: 'Seriously, did you see how many copies of Ms. Marvel they're selling and why can't I do one fucking interview without being asked what it's like to be a woman working in comics?'

Marvel Civil War: It's an allegory, fuckers. Mark Waid et al.
Part 1: 'It's like 9/11 and stuff.'

When a superhuman conflict turns deadly the government introduces the 'Superhero registration act', a concept which we've never seen before in comics history! This multi-series crossover promises the return of obscure heroes from Marvel's past (who is the mysterious 'Wolverine'?) and finally satisfies Marvel fans' need for a earth-shattering crossover event.

Punisher fucks a bear Garth Ennis, Steve Dillion (pencils)
Part 4 of 6: 'The Asiatic Black Bear'

Urban avenger Frank Castle stalks and defiles Ursus thibetanus, a species of bear native to the highlands of South-East Asia.
FOR MATURE READERS ONLY.

Runaways, Y the Last Man and Ex Machina: I pwn all you bastards, Brian K. Vaughn et al.
Part 1: Mayor Hundred laughs at new issues of Green Arrow.

In this hotly anticipated inter-company crossover event, Marvel's Runaways, Vertigo's Yorrick Brown and Wildstorm's Mayor Mitchell Hundred each find themselves in the 'pwnage zone', a shadowy dimension filled with comics by lesser writers.
WARNING: CONTAINS DETAILED PICTURES OF GERTRUDE'S VELOCIRAPTOR SHITTING OUT DIGESTED COPIES OF INFINITE CRISIS AND YORRICK'S MONKEY AMPERSAND THROWING IT AT A TRADE PAPERBACK OF HOUSE OF M.

Also on sale this week:

Spider Man #531: Let us never speak of 'The Other' again. The new costume's pretty cool huh?
Seven Soldiers: Frankenstein! #4: It'll be worth the wait, but that doesn't mean you'll ever know what's going on.
Astonishing X-men #14: 'If the guy who did Buffy says Grant Morrison's New X-men run happened, then it happened'.
Liberality for All #2: Apparently it's not all an elaborte joke and the writer is actually a xenophobic psycho with a persecution complex.
Desolation Jones #6: You never want to mess with Warren Ellis. He will fuck you up if he has time between updating his blog ten times a day. I'm going to tell him the Liberality guy called him a pussy and wait for the headline: 'Right-wing comic writer force-fed own balls over and over- police seek chain-smoking bald guy'.

That's it for this week true believers!