A Heartfelt Apology to Rock 'n' Roll Space Monsters

Gwar address the U.N, yesterday.

Well, I haven't updated for a while, which normally would mean that I had a life or a girlfriend or something (a Jedi craves these things not). It's actually because the network admins running my campus net' recieved a DMCA complaint against me. It's a fair cop, I was downloading. Now, they made me write a letter explaining that I broke the rules and I'm sorry, and they're probably going to send said letter to Santa Claus or Jesus's castle on the moon. The particular file I was busted for was the film Syriana, which is good and which you should go see. However, I did something much worse. I hurt hard-working immigrants to the planet earth, by downloading the music of the band Gwar.
I would like to use this public forum to apologise to Oderus Urungus, Flattus Maximus , Beefcake the Mighty, Jizmak Da Gusha, Balsac the Jaws of Death and miss Hymenstra Hymen. I understand, that as monsters from beyond space who have come to earth to defile our women, you face a great deal of prejudice and our culture of decency and hygeiene has made it near impossible for you to get gainful employment in the medical or food service industry. You have faced not only a backlash from critics who don't understand your unique perspectives, but also libellous accusations that you are in fact a 'joke band', or, worse still, the outcome of a marketing project. Furthermore, the harrassment of Mr. Urungus by police officers for exposing his genitalia onstage is an abuse of authority on par with the Rodney King beating.
Despite my deep and abiding respect for your band I made the unforgivable mistake of downloading your music on January 6th of this year. I understand that this doesn't only hurt a faceless record label, but a hard working group of deviants who have done nothing more than commit unspeakably foul acts against humans and animals alike. Please accept my apology.
And please don't eat me.

-G.