Say my name bitch!

AVAST!
If a man ye be an' not some scurvy dog, then ye surely know that it be Talk Like a Pirate day! ARR!
For that is why today I be going by me sea-name, as calculated on me computer machine: X marks tha spot for some manner a' devilish trickery the likesa which ye lubbers have never seen.
But beware, y'are destined fer a trip to tha boneyard if Pirate ye be not! ARR!
Now, for the blackest an' darkest of the sea shanties, known only to the pillaginest sea dogs:

Oooooh.....
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
Spongebob Squarepants!

Yours, with oodles of love and kisses

Captain Black Harry Bonney